Grateful For...



Trying to amuse housebound Bubble!

Hilariously, it is now Saturday and I still haven't managed to post more regularly.  Despite Cherie's nifty blogging tip, I haven't managed to follow her advice.  It's just been too tricky this week.  Bubble has chicken pox and is feeling very miserable!  Consequently she wants to nurse all the time.  She has pox on the soles of her feet which I think must be bothering her because she wants to be lifted all the time and is only content on my lap nursing.  She's relentless.  If my boob could pack its bags and fly to Spain, I think it would!!

Regardless of that fact, and rather unusually, I am grateful for Bubble still breastfeeding.  I know it's a lifestyle choice and there are times I wish I had my body and my independence back but I simply cannot fault the comfort that breastfeeding can offer Bubble especially in this circumstance.  I simply don't know how I would soothe her better.  If sitting on the sofa watching Finding Nemo on repeat with her continuously on the breast alleviates her suffering of that horrible itchiness, then so be it.

I am so grateful that my body can do that for her.

:o)

Ten Things...

Now that I'm back after a cheeky little break, what better way to get going again than a cheeky wee link up! (yes, I know I've done three in a row but they're just so much fun!) I've been invited by Shar at Mum on the Run to offer you 10 little nuggets of not so interesting info about me that might give you a giggle. So here goes...

 

1. I am a closet geek.

Well, not anymore by the looks of things! I LOVE fantasy. Wizards, unicorns, elves, hobbits, dragons, you name it, I love it! I have countless fantasy trilogies on my bookshelves and they are my achilles heel.

 

2. I love Disney cartoons.

I have a veritable collection of Disney animated films at home. I know most of the songs by heart and could probably quote you a line or twenty.

 

3. I have a mad music memory.

I do! It's so weird... anything in rhyme or song seems to stick in my head. If my degrees had been taught to me in rhyme I would have come out with a first class honours!

 

4. I have a huge capacity to eat.

It's true. I can eat voracious amounts of food. I can double eat what my husband does. Some say it's disgusting, I say it's greed. I just love food! I love to eat and consider myself a bit of a foodie... but my metabolism is starting to give up!!

 

5. I used to bellydance.

I originally wrote 'I can bellydance' but the truth is I haven't in nearly 10 years. I still see myself getting back to it - I was passionate about it back then. I even stayed in Cairo for a few weeks with my instructor, learning off local instructors. I think I was quite good but more importantly, it made me feel amazing about myself.

 

6. I am scared of the dark.

No really. My mind plays all sorts of tricks on me in the dark! I always have to have a nightlight.

 

7. I think I made a mistake becoming an architect.

I worked REALLY hard to qualify. I overcame financial and family issues to obtain my degrees. I fought tooth and nail to get the right projects to sit my professional exams on. I did really well in my Part 3 and I busted a gut to hang on to my job. But I still got made redundant. Sometimes, if you're continuously swimming against the current, you have to wonder if you're just not supposed to be going in that direction.

 

8. I regret not learning the piano.

My sister excels at piano and I just know I could do as well, given the time.

 

 

9. I only breastfeed from one side.

I had problems with my left breast. So Bubble has been reared on breastmilk entirely from one breast.

 

10. I hate my legs.

I can cope with every other aspect of my body but I hate my legs. If I could have surgery I would. They are like tree trunks. Even at my skinniest, they still looked like tree trunks. Meh.

 

So there you have it. Ten things you'd probably rather not know! Now when I was invited to join this link by the lovely lady Shar, it made me all gushy inside to be asked :o) so I'm sharing the love and inviting another five blog friends to divulge their deepest and darkest!

 

Over to you...

 

Sandra @ Chaos, Kids, Crochet and Cake

Lyn @ Attitude Matters

Shelley @ Shoebox Life

Rose @ Make Like Nike

Yours, The Moan, EH6

Thank You

This is just a little post to say a big THANK YOU  for all the lovely comments on my Wedding Day Linky Post.

You were all too kind. Brought a wee tear to my eye!

:'o)

Post It Note!

Just a quick note to say I'm off to bonnie Scotland to see the hubby ;o)  It's a last minute thing so bear with me whilst I'm off on a mini blogging break!

Back on Monday... Isn't it wonderful that it coincides with all this fabulous weather?!  Love Edinburgh in the sun!

:o)

Wedding Day Stories Linky

Although newly recruited to blogging, I'm totally excited by all these linkys that are appearing - what a great concept! It has been so much fun reading other's stories on the same subject. Shelley's inspired post for people to share their wedding experiences is just the perfect excuse to share wedding photos. :o)  Aaahh!  How gorgeous.  Makes me want to do it all over again!

I married my best friend in 2005. Both of us came from divorced families and as such, decided to host our big day away from both our home towns (mine being Newry and Wad's being Edinburgh). We married in a gem of a place in the foot of the Scottish Highlands, a place called Pitlochry. The venue was the Atholl Palace. We hosted the ceremony and the reception there... and all the guests stayed the night - after a big old ceilidh!! ;o)

It was a fantastic day but over far too soon. Rather than relive it in words, I'll give you a whistle-stop tour in some photos that were taken by our guests.
Enjoy!
 

The Venue - The stairs are to be my 'aisle'!

Me and mum before the ceremony...you can hardly see
her wheelchair in this photo. Ahem, yes, I am blond here! I took
to the bottle at uni and stayed blond until a couple of years ago!

I chose a harpist to play Canon in D
to walk down the 'aisle' to.

These were the table centrepieces, chosen to represent
Nanda.  It was said by all my aunts that after Nanda
passed away, each of them discovered a butterfly in
some capacity in each of their homes.

My 4 yr old sister as flowergirl, leading my other
two sisters and my chief bridesmaid, preceding me down the 'aisle'!

Me, my dad and my matron of honour successfully negotiating the
 'aisle'!  The smell of the lavender is something I'll never forget.

The view from the top of the aisle... after our vows had been exchanged
and the champagne had been poured!

'You want me to what?!'

'Whoops, here we go!'

'And strike a pose!'

Uncle Pete - aka UP - Wad's Aussie uncle. He attended with his wife from
Sydney and kindly agreed to play the bagpipes for us!

Brothers and sisters...From L to R
My brother - usher
Wad's brother - Best Man
My sister - bridesmaid
Wad!
My sister - Flower Girl
Me!
My sister - VIP ;o)
My brother - usher
My sister - bridesmaid

Wad - my groom,
My better half
My boy
My best friend

We lit a candle for our grandparents who could not share our day.

First Dance

 

My stepdad. He may not have given me away but he
raised me as his own :o)

The product of the perfect marriage!!

Hope you have a lovely day Shelley!  Enjoy every second...it flies by!

:o)

Grandmother's Ring Linky

I have just been to Thea's blog reading a post on her late grandmother and the ring she left her.  It left me thinking about my past and where I came from.  Where my daughter will essentially have come from.

The ring pictured on Thea's blog is my paternal grandmother's engagement ring, left to me when she died shortly after I was born.  She had died less than a year after my paternal grandfather had died so I never knew either of them and I know very little about them.  This is because my father never discusses them - probably because they both died before he turned 20.

My maternal grandparents were in my life from a very early age as the marriage between my mother and father broke down very quickly...they were too young.  My grandfather (Nanda) died when I was 20 and I still miss him.  He was always smiling.  My grandmother (Nanny) is still with us and I am very fond of her too.  She looks fabulous for her age and the only thing I want her to leave me is her youthful appearance! Lol!  She is also South African, born and raised in Zimbabwe (Rhodesia). Nanda had come from Northern Ireland to Africa to work in the police and that is how he met Nanny.  In that day, I expect it would have been quite a big deal to have gone so far from home.  If I had a chance to ask my Nanda one more question, I would ask him why he did it.  It impresses me that he did something so adventurous!

Of course, he's not nearly as impressive as Wad's grandfather.  A decorated lieutenant-colonel in the Royal Scots, he was an intimidating figure, with war stories to make your hair curl and connections to many persons of note including Queen Elizabeth II.  Wad's grandmother was an established 'lady', born of a very long standing Scottish clan.  Sadly, both have passed away, leaving only mementos of WWII and a clan name.  Wad's father was disowned by his mother shortly after Wad's grandfather died.  He has not seen his grandmother since he was 11 years old.  Tragic, considering Wad is the last surviving male heir to his grandmother's clan name.

Of course, history does not make the person.  Wad is not an army man.  He is an architect.  I am nothing like my forebears either but who knows?  There is an unsettling likeness between Bubble and her paternal grandmother at this age...I only hope it is just a physical likeness!

:o)

To sleep, perchance to...Sleep?!

image credit

It's Sunday morning.  I am bleary eyed, slurping on a strong coffee, ignoring the cataclysm-esque mess that is my living room and the squeals of delight from my daughter as she contributes to that mess with her aunties.  Her aunties (my sisters) are 10 and 6 years old and I had them for an overnight stay.  We had great fun but I'm dreading the point when I am going to have to face up to the carnage and start clearing it up!

I'm knackered.  Really tired.  I've not been posting this week because of it.  I'm so tired I thought I might be pregnant...but I've done a test and it's negative.  I'm prone to heart palpitations when I'm run down and tired and I've had them regularly this week.  Only little 10 second bursts but still, I know I'm run down when they come along.

Bubble's night-nursing has not abated one bit either.  In fact, she has been quite restless at night.  This is one of the major problems with co-sleeping.  If the little one is ill, uncomfortable or restless, you don't get a good night's sleep.  I've been awake at night, nearly tearing my hair out in frustration because Bubble won't settle.  It has made me think seriously about getting her out and into her own bed.

*yawn*

And yet, last night she cried out in her sleep (a bad dream perhaps) and I pulled her to me, her back to my tummy, and wrapped both my arms around her, whispering "it's ok Bubble, it's ok".  She reached her arm up and touched my face, said "Mama" and sighed.  Then fell into a deep and peaceful sleep that lasted til this morning.  When she woke, she woke with a big grin and held my face in both her chubby wee hands saying, "Mama?"

Moments like these are worth the frustrating times for me.

:o)

Grateful for...

...Optimism.

Specifically, my optimisim.  No matter how many roadblocks are thrown in my path, no matter how much it seems that they knock me down, I always manage to get up.  I never fail to get excited about the next course of action.  Never fail to put all my energy into making it work. No matter how often it fails...

That doesn't mean I don't feel the exhaustion and pain of failure.  I often feel so tired that I want to give it all up.

But I don't.

I ought to acknowledge that and be grateful for it.

:o)

It is enough.

I recently read (and commented on) a post by Shelley at My Shoebox Life on being yourself.  You can read it here.

It has really made me think.  Not just about being myself but about a whole host of issues surrounding me as a person and where I am in my life.  I wrote a post recently when I was a little down and in it I discussed how I was at loggerheads somewhat with two of my longest standing friends.  I am now convinced the issue truly lies with me and not them.

You see,  I think I spend an inordinate amount of effort trying to be something I'm not.  Forcing the square into the circle so to speak.  I also waste alot of energy worrying about what others think.  This is probably due to a slightly chameleon aspect to my personality where I try to fit in no matter what the scenario.

I think it's time I let go.  I think it's time I tried to just be exactly who I am.

This will be no easy thing.  I have spent years cultivating certain behaviours that are going to be difficult to undo.

But I think I'm going to give it go.  And let the chips fall where they may.

(Thank you Shelley.)

Grateful for...

...a daughter's delight. :o)