Monday 10 October 2011

One Child Wonder

First off, can I say thankyou to all the lovely comments on last Saturday's Grateful post!  Bubble is on the mend and devastating my make-up bag as I type!  Although if anyone can suggest how I get her eat anything other than cheerios and digestives, I'd be awfully grateful! (again...that's a good one for next Saturday!)

I discovered recently that a friend of mine is an only child.  Which astounded me as she has none of the usual attributes associated with single children.  She is not selfish nor does she have any family issues.  In fact she always has a smile for you and is a caring listener.

The reason this is of interest to me is because, for some strange reason, I don't know that I will have any more children.  I think I always thought I'd have two or three and this feeling comes as a surprise.  When trying to concieve Bubble, I desperately wanted her.  There was nothing in my life more important.  Now that I have her, I feel blessed and I am in total adoration of every aspect, every molecule that makes up my wonderful little girl.

But I have no desire to have another.

It's not that I don't want another baby, I'm just totally indifferent.  In my heart of hearts, I want Bubble all to myself, her and me against the world! Lol... But to have another just because...well, I'm not so sure.  I feel that I should want the second child as much as I wanted Bubble.  I think I worry that if I don't want the next as much, will I love that child as much as I love her?

Then again I have to ask myself, is it really such a wrong to not have any more children?  Everyone says to me, 'Oh! You have to give her a wee brother or sister' but why?  It didn't adversely affect my friend so why would it affect my daughter?  It isn't as if we live in the middle of the desert with no other human contact.  She has plenty of friends and second cousins to play with.  Or am I just justifying my lack of interest in another baby?  Answers on a postcard!

Am I being weird?  Have any other mothers felt like this?!

Help! :o)

3 comments:

  1. Been there, felt that!
    And also felt incredibly guilty for feeling it too.
    Wrote a post called 'Just the One, Then'
    (http://mummyontherun.blogspot.com/2011/06/just-one-then.html) if you're interested!
    It's your family and your decision.
    :-)

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  2. Hi Cheryl, currently having similar thoughts...the longer I leave the potential sibling gap - the more I am starting to feel that just Amelie all to myself would be quite nice but I also feel conflicted because I am one of 5 and love all my brothers and sister so much.

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  3. I have a 7 year gap between my eldest and my second child - I had wanted more but it just didn't happen. Eventually I went back to work and was starting to do things for me again and I got used to the idea it wasn't going to happen - and I was content with that. Then, of course, as soon as life got a bit easier out popped two in rapid succession! Life's not set in concrete and Bubble is still tiny so you may feel different in a year or two - but if not there are plenty of good reasons to only have one child- as I am reminded every time I open my purse!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for dropping by! I'll be sure to pop over to you too sometime soon :o)

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